Family gene's are sometimes so strong, you watch those sad programs on TV where people try trace their biological mom or dad, or siblings. For years these people have tried and sometimes the parents are the one's who can't get over the sadness or regret, and go looking. They're left in limbo, to scared of the rejection and the hurt, wondering!
I am so greatful my story is nothing like that. I had two wonderful parents who most of the time loved me. Like most kids I had my moments of mischief, like the time Dad caught me smoking, gave me a whollipping I never forget. Then Mom found the packet of cigerettes, told dad and I got another whollipping. How dumb could you get!!Anyway most of the time I was good, never really got into any mischieve.
I remember people asking Mom "Is that your child? she looks nothing like you" well Mom said she got sick of the questioning, so told them what they wanted to hear "No she's adopted" that normally shut them up. Well a seed was planted in my small head, and until today I sometimes wonder ... I do look like my fatherside of the family, so just maybe there is a grain of truth there somewhere. Jokingly I mentioned this to my mother on the last visit to South Africa, when once again her neighbour uttered the same words, and she gave the same reply jokingly ... I asked are you sure my aunt is not really my mother.
Always had a special place in my heart for my aunt, a secret wonder if she is not my real mother. We had a little family gathering to catch up with my Dad's brother and sister, I hadn't seen them in 18 yrs, wow that's along time. Dad passed away in Sept 1999. We had a great time reminising. My Aunt dropped me off and while we were driving, we chatted away happily. I realised how very much alike we were, even looking alike. How strange is that! But When it came to saying goodbye, it felt like a little piece of my was torn apart, leaving a hole in my heart. Gave her such a big hug, poor woman proably had no idea why.
Oh how I wish I was brave enough to have asked that question, would I just have made a fool of myself. I am 50 something what does it matter anyway.
Until nexttime
Rina
A little chance to do some painting
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A friend posted a back to school photo of her and her mini me. It was a
perfect little snapshot of joy. I loved it so much, I just had to do a
quick mixed ...
7 months ago
I have 3 sisters and a brother and they all had the same colouring - dark brown hair and blue eyes, I have light brown hair and hazel eyes. They favoured my mother and I took after Dad. I always felt the 'odd' one out until I met my father's family on a trip to the far north Qld,(Mum was a Melbournian) I was the one they fussed over and spoilt because I was so like them in personality and very sporty.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is very like one of my sisters in personality and drive, even their handwriting is the same, your connection is you share the same gene pool. It would be nice to keep in touch with your Aunty maybe become pen-pals, the oldies love to receive letters.
Frances
Thank you for the visit to my Afrikaans site. This opened a wound for me to read your blog. Very well writen, I would have loved to feel the same, but I believed my mother loved us (3 kids from a first marriage) until after her death and she left everything in her will to her daughter in her 2nd Marriage. She always had a "soft spot" for the younger sister, but we never realized how little we meant to her. Nor did we ever neglect or wronged her. It hurts more than I ever thought it would. To all mothers - Once you are gone you can never change that decision. Keep it clean for all the generations who did not know you for ever on in years to come.
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